Don’t Stare Please

There is a saying and it goes something like this:

“When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade”

Well, life is giving me lemons these days and I am trying to make a lemonade out of them.

Though I live in a modern city of Pakistan, still life for a working women is hard. Especially for those women who have to take public transport.

I recently have started using Metro Bus Service for reaching office daily. I think it is safe, you don’t have to wait for buses (not more than 5 minutes) and above all you reach to your destination timely as you avoid the rush hour.

Though I am not a PMLN supporter nor I involve myself in political discussion, but I think this is a good step by the government especially for women and must be appreciated.

Coming back to the topic, I want to highlight problems that a women has to face while taking a public transport for work. I personally have experienced all the below mentioned problems, let me know if any of the women readying this have also experienced the same:

  • You are properly covered, yet people see you as if you are going on a date
  • Men (of all ages) stare at you for no reason at all.
  • The look of some people kills you. They see you as you are a show piece.
  • Having reasonable good looks is a crime for which you are and will be stared for.
  • You will be called/commented with disgusting names if you are walking on the road mainly by guys on the bikes. Either they will whistle or pass a comment or sing a cheap Bollywood song.
  • A car with obviously a man in the driving seat will slow down and take it to the side where you are walking (as if the girl wants a lift).

I experience some of these things daily. I’ve to walk a lot from metro station to my office so I really get irritated and disgusted by the fact that men simply cannot accept a women walking alone on the road, or wear a jeans or use public transport.

I know the best defense I have is to ignore, but for how long? Why women always have to stay quiet and ignore all this? Why don’t the parents of these rich and sick minded guys teach them to lower their gaze when they see a girl walking or passing by? I am sorry for harsh words, but this is the dilemma of this society: Men can do whatever they want and women just have to ignore.

I am desperate for these small things to change. They must change. We have big educational institutes with big fee structures but why don’t these basic ethics change? Where are our moral values?

I myself have a brother. I’ve always seen my father giving respect to women, lowering his gaze. I see the same in my brother. Perhaps you are wondering I belong to a strict Islamic family. Well no, I belong to a middle class educated family like most of you.

My question is: Where this society is heading to? Why can’t we (women) respectfully walk on the road, travel on public transport without being stared at?


It’s 2017
, how much time does this country needs to be civilized and accept women?



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